if i exist, what else does?

Alright. Keep it together, Ashlyn. You too, Annie. I'm together! I'm. Oh, god. Did I actually. I didn't, did I? Oh, god, how am I ever going to speak to them again?! Who's bright idea was it to trust me with the bloody War Child?!?! You saved the world, Annie. And we're... all together again. That has to be worth it. Doesn't matter! I'm the worst mother in the world, and now Hal and Tom Have Alex. Okay? I'm gonna stop you right there. Here goes nothing.

David, Martin, Annie, I don't care what you're doing tonight, but Annie the Hysterical Ghost and I absolutely demand your presence for tea. And... possibly dinner, but mostly tea. It will be nice, and we will be happy, and no one will d.... er, drink bad tea, because I'm physically incapable of making a bad cuppa, and it will be just like old times, and everyone will be HAPPY. Did I mention that? Happy, dammit!

... Oh, who am I kidding. We're both a little hysterical. But, um. Tea?

God, I am so glad the MTN's up and running again. I think I spent two solid weeks sleeping in the clinic's break room and, let me tell ya? Those teeny little seats do not a good bed make. You never do know how much you miss your own until you haven't slept in it for awhile. I swear I could just... sprawl here forever and be totally content, even if I did kinda starve to death in the process. Oh, well? This mattress is totally, totally worth it.

.... Yes, I know how that sounds. No, I'm not going to change it. Way to tired to edit myself right now. English?

( David )

OKAY. Enough dicking around here. I'm looking for a vampire and two werewolves, which all of you are probably thinking is a bad, bad idea, but trust me, I know what I'm doing! ... What was I saying? Oh, right! Vampire! Two werewolves! You guys better not be dead or... not here, because otherwise I'm going to be really pissed!

Oh, I'm Ashlyn, by the way. She's Annie. I'm very much alive and she's very much a ghost, so you can imagine how fun that is for me. But that's not important. Mitchell, George, Nina – speak now or forever hold your peace! Or, no, not forever. Forever's a long time. Just... now would be great, because she's driving me a little bit crazy.

Which is... pretty obvious. I'll stop talking now. Hi?

( Look. My first boyfriend took naked photos of me while I was asleep and put them on the internet. My second boyfriend got drunk and asked my mum for a threesome. My third boyfriend pushed me down the stairs and killed me. So I think a vampire's pretty much... marriage material, given my track record. )